Cancer – Days ending in why?

 You think you're doing great then it creeps up behind
Worries and thoughts you've kept deep in your mind 

Thoughts you can't share to those that care
For those are the ones whom you should protect, not scare

Such a voice of worry and upset in your head
But to everyone else it's done and dead

You were the one that fought this and won
Carry on with your life now as that chapters done
But do they know there's not a day goes by 
Where you don't question a thought to what if and why?
Every niggle and pain plants a doubt in your brain
For every success story you hear there's always one in vain
Happy times and sad times you just never know
When the tsunami of emotions is going to show
It's not being negative or wallowing in self pity
It's the aftermath of this disease and yes it's shitty 
But you can't let it win or take control of your mind
You need to accept it's there and try to be kind
Acknowledge where you are now and what you've become
The love that it's brought, challenges overcome
For every negative it's brought there's a positive close by
It's what we need to hold onto for those days which end in what if and why?
R Cummings 16th November 2019

The battle – a lesson in life



The battle – a lesson in life


You chose to appear in my life, why I’ll never know

Blissfully unaware you continued to grow

A disease so cruel there once was no cure

How you got there, I’ll never be sure

You turned my world upside down, brought a whirlwind of pain

Yet of all the heartache and tears so much I have gained

You taught me unconditional love of family and friends

Who’d stand by my side until the bitter end

You taught me to fight for what was already mine

The ultimate battle, the prize more time

I shed my last tear brought on by your fear

We continued to fight for over a year

I wear you scars with pride, no reason to hide

Yet these just scratch the surface, of the ones deep inside

Sometimes I got lost and searched deep to find

A strength inside me to keep a positive mind

My choices were my power with medicine too

A deadly combination my strength grew and grew

I persisted and prayed

Your poison I slayed

And through sheer grit and strength

You crumbled at my defence

In just over a year

You’re no longer here


Those words I’d long to hear,

“I’ve been given the all clear”

It’s a true miracle for sure

To be given a cure


One I’ll hold dear

For those no longer here

See that ultimate prize

Has opened my eyes

To the beauty in life

Even in modern day strife

I can feel the air in my lungs and the breeze on my face

Cherish those moments of laughter and every embrace

For my prize is invaluable no money can buy

And we can all gain a little if only we try

I’ll continue my message and to be grateful for each day

As you just never know when it could be taken away


R Cummings

  24th September 2018

A cancer survivor

Get through today

Sometimes we just have to teach ourselves to look at things differently

It’s the morning you say

A brand new day

Stretch your arms open wide 

And breathe deep inside

For a minute your free 

And your eyes they can see

A mind that is clear 

Of worries and fears

Of if only it would stay

Forever in each day

How free I would be 

And be the happier me

To see the true beauty of what I’m surround

to rediscover true loves once had I found

But todays not the day

It’s not here to stay

But there’s always tomorrow 

That’s a day without sorrow

So get through today and be the best that I can

For tomorrow might just bring a whole new plan

R Cummings 24th Feb 2017

The cats out the bag

The cats out the bag

The tongues may wag

But the ones who care

Are already there

No longer ashamed or reason to hide

Head held high to beat this with pride

Of what I’ve read and heard

At times yes I’m scared

But thoughts and fears

Lead to worries and tears

Oh but it’s alright to cry every once in a while

And when you’ve let it all out wipe those tears with a smile

See a smile is infectious to all that you see

And a smile received back makes a happier me

Positivity and well-being shine through my soul

Nothing stands in the way of achieving my goal

And with the help and support from people I greet

This cancer I will conquer and once for all defeat

R Cummings 5th January 2017

I was lost until I found myself

I was lost until I found myself

I was in debt until I understood true wealth.

I was broken until I learned what to fix.

I reached my limits until I tore down those bricks.

I was unsure until I discovered me.

I was trapped until I set myself free.

I was scared until I understood my fears.

Inconsolable until I shared my tears.

I was weak until I had to be strong

To face it alone I’m glad I was wrong

I felt no one cared until you showed me my worth.

With love together we’ll move heaven and earth.

R 11/09/2017