Melanoma and Me
The fight of my life
The story so far

Daily Dosage 0015

15th November 2023

Quote of the day

  1. “The one absolute, unselfish friend that man can have in this selfish world—the one that never proves ungrateful or treacherous—is his dog.” George Graham Vest
  2. “I have found that when you are deeply troubled, there are things you get from the silent devoted companionship of a dog that you can get from no other source.’ Doris Day

Man, and Woman’s’ Best Friend

Today it’s day 15 of the 100 squat a day challenge and 15 days of writing my blog. I’m half way and things are definitely getting more challenging aches, pains and niggles and struggling to think of things to write which keep people reading my blogs. I’m here though and actually really enjoying and hope you are too.

I’ve always been a dog lover over a cat person. I’ve tried but for these reasons I just can’t seem to like them;

  1. They have literally no loyalty and will go to several houses to be fed given half the chance.
  2. The way they just sh1t on your lawn and your expected to pick it up. If it was a dog that would be a completely different story.
  3. The way the parade their star fish bottom in your face

For me I’d take a dog any day over a cat. A few months before I was diagnosed with cancer Ste finally gave in and I got my own way. We researched a few breeds and both decided on a whippet. I’ll be honest I would have gone for anything I wanted one so badly but getting a whippet was one of our smartest decisions in life.

They always say don’t pick the first one you see well we did exactly that. We went over to a whippet breeder who had two puppies left. One was a bit feisty and playful and then there was Woody just sat there all calm and chilled out. I knew he was the one for us to bring a bit of calm in the house.

From the moment he has been here he really has been the best dog ever. Hardly any trouble not many accidents and I can honestly say without him I wouldn’t have had a purpose to get out on the difficult days even if it was just for a moment.

They say dogs are like their owners well Woody being a whippet is tall and slim so maybe we’re the exception to the rule. He does however have a few similarities like me these are;

  1. He doesn’t like cats
  2. He likes walking outside
  3. He likes to sit by the fire to get warm
  4. He likes to sleep

We call him my shadow at home as literally as soon as I put my coat on or shoes, he’s there next to me as if to say I’m coming to. I’m literally sat here typing and he’s giving me that sad stare to say (can you either put the fire on or can I go out for a poo). Either way he’s making me feel guilty.

Walking with a limp

A few months ago, my mum took me to the local reservoir we were going to walk round as we hadn’t done it for a long time and this was something both me and her had challenged ourselves at different times during our fitness journey. This time it was mum who had the ailment. She had plantar facetious (easy for you to say). She was still insistent we go walking round the res (not sure who I get my stubbornness from!). So, we set off, Woody was in tow living his best life sniffing and looking at ducks. Mum was hobbling especially as the path we were on was uneasy. We continued to walk at a snail’s pace and after a bit mum rested on the next bench that we came to. It was clear she was in pain so I suggested we turn back. It took quite a while to get back mum was hobbling all along.

The next day I was walking Woody and he was limping a little bit. I noticed it but couldn’t think of anything he had done whilst being out to cause the limp. Later that evening my mum and dad came round for tea and my mum mentioned did he have a limp and I said yes but I could work out why. She was still hobbling around our house and in the kitchen.

Then later on Ste had been watching this you tube video of this man who had spent thousands in vet bills trying to find out why his greyhound was limping. He happened to have broken his legs. It turned out there was nothing wrong with the dog it was literally limping out of empathy for his owner. We laughed at this so tried it out sure enough every time Woody saw my mum, he limped a bit. When he was out with me absolutely fine! It was so funny just glad we realised before we took him to the vets for a check-up.

Woody has been with me through thick and thin. The number of times I’ve been struggling just a walk with him or a hug does me the world of good. When I’ve been slow and not much mobility he just goes at my pace. Often when I’ve been upset, he comes and rests his chin on the sofa arm next to me to say ‘Cheer up love’. I don’t know if it’s a whippet, dog or pet thing but he really does love me unconditionally and can lift my moods most of the time.

So, here’s to you

 Woody Happy 7th Birthday for tomorrow. The one companion who’s been with me on this cancer journey and has kept me going, the one who doesn’t answer back or ask for much (unlike my kids). Tomorrow, I’ll get you your favourite treat.

Lessons Learnt

  1. Don’t always trust a limping dog
  2. Pets can be a lot more emotionally sensitive then we realise
  3. Pets can boost ourselves both physically and mentally. (even cats, hamsters, fish, gerbils etc)

See you tomorrow

The story so far

Daily Dosage 0014

14th November 2023

I will get a better photo of us Gill for next time x

Quote of the day

  1.  “The power of community to create health is far greater than any physician, clinic or hospital.” – Mark Hyman
  2. One of the marvellous things about community is that it enables us to welcome and help people in a way we couldn’t as individuals. When we pool our strength and share the work and responsibility, we can welcome many people, even those in deep distress, and perhaps help them find self-confidence and inner healing.” – Jean Vanier

Joining forces

Today was a much better day I’m pleased to tell you. The storm has passed in the Cummings household it’s just a bit breezy!!

I’ve done my 100 squats, sorted some paperwork, sent some parcels, took Woody for a walk and generally think I’m winning at life so I will hold onto this feeling before it inevitably comes crashing to an abrupt end. The best of my day however was just going to my Battle Cancer class.

I’ve been going to this for a couple of weeks now and really enjoying it. It’s a free programme and runs nationwide. There just so happens to be a cross fit gym near me that runs the programme. Everyone that attends the classes have been affected by cancer in some way or another (either been given the all clear or still under going treatment or living with cancer). We’re all in the same not so elite club none of us really wanted to join but are just making the most of the situation. A bit like when you sign up for a discount card for somewhere you’re probably only going to visit once and then later regret the number of emails appearing in your inbox and the card now taking up space in your purse/wallet but was worth it for the £10 discount you received that time.

Anyway, the battle cancer programme tailors for all abilities. There are always scalable options for people to do the exercises that are suitable to them. We’re all joining forces and coming together sometimes slightly feeling out of our comfort zones but each time learning and hopefully getting better. I love the way we’re becoming a little community spurring each other on and getting to know each other.

As someone with cancer and an invisible disability I really lost a lot of confidence when it came to getting back into fitness. I have always been active so to start back from literally square one it took a lot of courage to step into my local leisure centre to initially go swimming and then the gym. I really had to build up a lot of confidence. Sometimes asking if the music could be turned down when the young instructors were reliving their Ibiza night bangers. Feeling like you have to apologise for your situation and explain how it affects you can be a burden. Until it happened to me, I never gave noise a second thought. Now it’s a daily thing I face and have to think about how I manage my day however my noise sensitivity is getting better and so is my speech. I do still avoid generally busy periods and don’t go to any classes.

I don’t go out the house without my flares (ear plugs not 70’s jeans) and my noise cancelling headphones which I play my 90’s beats which drowns background noises out. These have been a life saver for me.

But walking into Battle Cancer you don’t have to be worried about those situations. You don’t need to explain yourself. The instructor knows everyone’s’ unique situation and that can take a lot of pressure of. All different ages coming together for the same purpose to not let cancer beat or define us. I really like Pete the instructor you can tell how passionate he is about the programme. How it has improved peoples lives already. Him and Suzi make it feel achievable and enjoyable at the same time and I’m truly grateful for the opportunity to do this and for them taking up their spare time.

What makes this even more fantastic is that one of my old (well same age me, so young) friends is doing the course with me. She also has become a member of the cancer club. Whereas years ago, we were playing in the playground together mucking about, now were playing in a bigger playground and the sky is the limit. I’m so happy I get to share this journey with her even if it wasn’t one neither of us wanted to be on, we’ve got this!

For more information on the Battle Cancer Programme please see the following link. If you or someone you know could benefit from the programme, get them to enquire. What’s the worst that could happen?

https://www.battlecancer.com/about-battle-cancer

Here’s also a link to the cross fit gym that we train at to do the programme which is a really friendly gym open for everyone;

https://www.crossfitdeltafox.co.uk/

See you tomorrow

X x x

The story so far

Daily Dosage 0013

13th November 2023

Quote of the day

  1. ‘Stop trying to calm the storm, calm yourself, the storm will pass.’ – Matt Hogan

One bad day

We can all have one bad day. I think today has been mine. It started off really good, I did something totally new which I enjoyed. However, there has been a bit of a storm in the Cummings household tonight. Being a parent can be a difficult job I think deep down we’re all winging it (well I am anyway). I’m at that stage now where my kids are older so you’re not making decisions for them you’re just having to trust they making the right decisions and that’s it’s difficult when they’re not. You have to discipline them for making the wrong choices but they are these independent individuals you have raised to be just that. Therein lies the conflict and somehow you feel a sense of guilt responsibility for this. This little people didn’t come with a manual and if they did, I think it was in a totally foreign language to what I know.

Because of tonight’s ‘storm’ I am honestly struggling to think what to write so this blog is definitely going to be a short one. I think the key to take from today is that not to let one bad day become a bad week, a bad year and so on. Things can’t always get resolved overnight somethings take time and I’m sure tomorrow will be a brighter day but for tonight we just have to ride the storm.

So today I will focus on going to bed with the positives;

  1. 100 squats completed
  2. Wrote a short blog
  3. Did something completely new

Hope you’ve all had a good day and if not don’t worry there’s always tomorrow

See you then

P.S No children were harmed in the making of this blog!!

X x x

The story so far

Daily Dosage 0012

12th November 2023

Quote of the day

1.’If you find something very difficult to achieve yourself, don’t imagine it impossible – anything possible and proper for another person can be achieved as easily by you’ – Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, 6.19

We all can do it

Hope you’ve all had a good weekend.  I’ve had a pretty good weekend spent catching up with different friends and resting. Today we went to cheer on my close friends Declan and Jenny doing the Lytham 10K.  When we got there the weather was terrible. I was hoping for a medal just standing outside in the rain and walking to near the finish line (never mind the 10K!)! It was cold, wet and miserable, something which I know really would have affected Dec.

Dec who is registered blind and uses a cane also has ASD (autism spectrum disorder). To do a 10K is an achievement in itself for most people, but to walk the whole thing unaided is absolutely amazing! Jen managed a P.B and I think even she will agree this was definitely by sheer determination and mind over matter, especially as she started at the back with her son Declan.

These two are absolute testament that anything is possible if you put your mind to it.  Jen’s legs looked like two slender tins of corn beef when she had finished the weather had totally battered them. Walking to the pub to seek shelter I felt like I was walking with a tin of spam, I think the mustard wool hat topped it off. The poor girl was shivering and was starting to seize up it had been that cold. Dec was on cloud nine when he finished and rightly so.

We may not always be Olympic athletes and achieve world records but showing others and inspiring them to maybe do things that are outside of their comfort zones now, that is something that you should hold with pride. We can either look at people’s achievements with green eyed jealously and find a million of reasons why we haven’t achieved as much as them or we can look at their achievements as a way of inspiring us in our own lives. Today my friends did that as well as raise a fantastic amount of money for Rosemere Cancer Foundation (somewhere I have benefited from). So, who knows Jen and Dec maybe I might be brave next year and get my corn beef thunder thighs out to do a 10K or do something else out of my comfort zone.  In the mean time I hope you both enjoyed your well earned tea and beers.

If anyone would like to sponsor Declan I’m sure he would be more than grateful

https://justgiving.com/page/jennifer-sumner-1698496493907

The story so far

Daily Dosage 0010

10th November 2023

Quote of the day

  1. You’ve done it before and you can do it now. See the positive possibilities. Redirect the substantial energy for your frustration and turn it into positive, effective, unstoppable determination.’ -Ralph Marston

I don’t think I could have found a more suitable quote for me. Sometimes when life seems to give us more than our fair share of sh1t. We need to use that energy and frustration and turn it into something positive.

Day 10 50 squats done if I do the other that will be 1,000 squats. Had to get the massage gun out today though to alleviate some muscle I didn’t know I had!!

Here’s a poem to my younger self;

A message to my self

If I could take a step back in time.

Talk to the young girl whom would live the woman’s decline

I’d tell her there are treasures more precious than gold

And she is so privileged she already holds

She is amongst Queens when it comes to her health

For amongst the sick and the poor she has the wealth

But for some reason she doesn’t see the beauty inside

See wants to fit in and no longer hide

She’s going away, doesn’t want to go red

So stupidly she goes on the sunbed instead

Blissfully unaware of the damage she’s caused

And the future body she’s already scarred

For her moment of vain

In years to come, she would feel the pain

Years will go by and in a twist of fate

A holiday in the white isles she finds her mate

Then along come the children a girl and a boy

To fill her heart with so much joy

A few years go by not without a few highs and lows

But from these times she learns and each time she grows

Then the day does come which most people fear

She holds it together but not without a tear

Deep down she knows this isn’t the end

For positivity and determination happen to be close friends

The treatment will feel like she can’t carry on

But despite the pain she does until it is gone

The mistakes that she’s made she puts on show

By writing about the tales of her woes

But unfortunately, this wasn’t the happy ending she sought

A few years from now there’s another battle to be fought

This time it’s far harder than the last

And she would need the same grit and determination she had in the past

But she’s done it before and will do it again

For future, past and present she won’t let cancer win

Lessons Learnt

  1. Don’t ever over expose yourself in the sun (especially not naked you could get arrested in some countries). Factor 50 is your friend. It’s great for wrinkles too. Please don’t ever use a sunbed it’s 2023 these things should be banned.
  2. Look after your health it really is the most valuable asset you have in your power.
  3. If you’ve had your fair share of pain you’ve survived until today you can survive tomorrow.

See you tomorrow

X x x

The story so far

Daily Dosage 0009

9th November 2023

Quote of the day

  1. ‘If your actions create a legacy that inspires others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, then you are an excellent leader.’ – Dolly Parton

Inspire others

Day 9 of the squat challenge and today I’m feeling really tired. I think a combination of a late night, the mental draining from writing each day and just generally feeling physically sore is kicking in today.  I can tell I’m tired because unfortunately I don’t have the patience for the kids when I’m like this. Normally around this time I’m due to take some medication and I can’t deal with constant questions of ‘why’. It’s a bit like being really hangry and tired at the same time but not always feeling hungry. One of my kids in particular is very inquisitive shall I say and this can be a real struggle on days like this. Don’t worry after my tea (not dinner we’re northern) I’ll make sure I sit down and have a chat, that’s if I’m allowed in their room! (the joys of teenagers). Usually the questions (battle) are life threatening events such as going out somewhere, wi-fi, phones or what’s for tea. I think that pretty much sums up everything.

I did go to a personal trainer this morning. I thought bout cancelling but I didn’t and despite me feeling tired I just got something done. Sometimes we feel like that and sometimes just doing a bit is better than nothing. I’ve been going for a couple of weeks now (just once a week) because although I am quite dedicated when it comes to exercising, I definitely need tips on exercises and technique and some times a little push when I otherwise wouldn’t. The rest of the afternoon I’ve literally slept and looking outside now it’s pitch black. The dark nights have set in now which I know makes it a lot harder for those of you who are planning on exercising tonight rather than get in your comfy pyjamas and sit in front of the fire. It’s like our bodies want to go into hibernation mode, sometimes we have to fight that off and do it. So, if you do, do that I promise I’ll get the rest of my squats done and take the dog for a walk in the dark, cold and rain how’s that for a deal?

The reason why I put the above quote up today was that as I was getting out of my mum’s car after the gym, she told me that she too has started doing 50 push ups off the kitchen top (not stood on the kitchen top I hope). She said she breaks it up into manageable 25 sets and is working towards doing 100. How amazing is that! I think inspiring others to do more and learn more is a precious gift and does feel warm and fuzzy inside. There are so many people that inspire me in a variety of aspects of my life, battling cancer, facing challenges, being a better person. No-one knows everything we can all learn a do more if we are open to listen to others. We might not always agree with their opinions but you never know you might just learn something new.

I often ponder on why and our purpose in life and I think ultimately to inspire others what an achievement that would be. Listening to Steve Back shall last night he was very passionate about inspiring the net generation to ultimately save the oceans, rare species and the planet. I think looking around the room there will definitely be a young generation that care about our planet and hopefully take action inspired by him and many others Sir David Attenborough being one.

So, whatever your passion is in life as long as its for the greater good please continue to inspire others.

You’re never too old to learn something new. I learnt this last night when I didn’t have a clue what half the oceans habitat are called.

See you tomorrow

X x x

The story so far

Daily Dosage 0008

8th November 2023

Quote of the day

  1. ‘None of us, including me ever do great things. But we can all do small things, with great love, and together we can do something wonderful’ – Mother Teresa

The Three Amigos decide to Stand Up to Cancer

Now if you have previously read some of my blogs you may have come across a couple of tales about the three amigos, Brain, Body and Bottom. These three friends are connected to a slightly vertically challenged (now middle-aged woman). For the purpose of these stories, we will call her Miss Determination (even though now she’s a Mrs and maybe not so much determined but more stubborn (as her husband likes to remind her most days!)

Anyway, the three amigo’s Brain, Bottom and Body had watched Stand Up to Cancer last Friday evening and as much as they enjoyed the programme it really upset them. All of all the stories of people affected by cancer. In particular one young girl who was just 11 and sadly died of cancer after also losing her mum to cancer.

 As the three friends sat there together tissues in hand wiping away the tears Bottom said ‘It’s so sad, we need to do something to help these people’.

Body who was shaking from the crying said ‘I agree we need to fight back’.

Brain said ‘I have an idea I have seen these 100 squats a day challenge, why don’t we give it a go and raise some money for research?’

To which Bottom replied ‘Squit challenge won’t that be messy?’

No said Brain ‘SQUATS’. ‘You know where you bend your knees and then lift up. It’s supposed to be really good to get a firm bottom, Bottom.’

‘I’m not sure I can do the squats you know Brain I’ve got a sore leg from playing football,’ said Body.

‘Don’t worry ‘said Brain ‘we can think of something similar to do. What about sit ups maybe?’

‘Yes, I can do them no problem!’ said Body.

‘Great!’ said Brain. ‘To be honest I think I will struggle counting. It’s not my strong point at the moment my head get all fuzzy and I lose concentration.’

‘Don’t worry,’ said Body. ‘I have a clicker counter from my old days on the doors we can use that’.

Bottom was looking rather sheepish then said ‘you know what I’m really nervous if I squat too much what if I trump and have an accident? I haven’t got a spare pair of undies since I blew a hole in my other ones.’

‘Don’t you worry,’ said Body. ‘I have got a new pair of special Lycra ones you can borrow not only do the tuck your tummy in the well keep you trumps in too’.

Bottom looked down at his tummy then looked at the other two and they all laughed.

‘Right then’ said Brain ‘we need to set a schedule and pick a time we can do it together. I’ve developed a timetable and marked each day for the whole month on the calendar’. To which the other two smiled and rolled their eyes back. Secretly they know if they ever needed a robust plan to stick too Brain was the girl for the job.

So, every day for the whole of the month the three friends would get together as planned and do their squats and sit ups. Brain would get the counter and click every time they did a rep. Bottom would laugh every time, she made a noise but was thankful for the stretchy pants. Body was also glad that she could join in despite being injured.

Some days the three friends would have to break up the squats into smaller sections just because they were short on time. The main thing is they got them done. 100 squats/sit ups a day for 30 days.

Bottom could definitely feel her cheeks getting firmer. Body could feel her stomach getter tighter and Brain could manage to count each rep more than she thought she could have.

The End of the Challenge

It was day 30, the last day of the challenge. The three friends had religiously stuck to the challenge. At times they thought about stopping especially as it hurt so much but then they each thought of the little girl in the programme and carried on through gritted teeth and clenched cheeks!

‘That’s it’ said Brain ‘we’re done, how fantastic it that’. Body looked up and smirked which suggested she didn’t agree.

‘What’s the matter Body?’ asked Brain.

‘I feel like I’ve not fully done the challenge,’ said Body.

‘Don’t be stupid’ said Brain, ‘you adapted it because there was something you couldn’t do. You stuck to the challenge showing other people they too can adapt to suit their physical needs’.

‘I guess you’re right’ said Body sticking her chest in a proud sort of way.

Brain looked at their donation page. She turned to the others slightly disappointed and said ‘unfortunately we haven’t met our donation target’

Bottom looked at the two friends and said ‘that doesn’t matter at all. Remember that little girl, we did it for her and for people like her. Together we stood up for cancer to inspire others to do the same and give people hope, that’s what matters.’  

 ‘You’re always so right,’ said Brain.

Then the three amigos gave each other a big hug. They all felt really proud of themselves and deservedly so.

‘Right then who’s getting in the bath first?’ asked Body clutching her stomach.

Day 8 100 squats done!

Sorry it’s a bit late for today but I got it done in the end, keep going everyone and thank you for reading

See you tomorrow

X x x